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THE FINAL BROADCAST
WHAT WE LEARNED TODAY
August 20, 2014 10:00pm
Class, please take your seats, you'll find your name on your desk. OK, welcome back to school! We are all super excited to see you back! Now normally we would begin second grade with the new lessons, but it seems some very important things have been forgotten over the summer break. Let's go over these briefly right now:

- Lice exist. Having lice is nothing to be ashamed of, you are actually giving life! Now use this shampoo to kill them.
.
- Cooties do not exist, but calling out the victims of cooties makes you the oppressor. Write on the board 100 times, "I'm sorry I said you have cooties. You have lice."

- The First Amendment to the United States Constitution provides that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof ..." and Article VI specifies that "no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States". Do you know what that means, children? That's OK, the Supreme Court doesn't know either.

Listen up, children! We are going to work on these 2 or 3 things until we get them right. It make take more than a day, but you must know them before you can advance. These are really quite important lessons, kids. Oh, and you four sitting there in the back... yes, Karen, KrOB, Sherilyn and Puzz.... please report to the principal's office. Sorry, you'll have to miss the FINAL BROADCAST of NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND because of what was written in the chatbox.

NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND: Radio schooled at home.


Chatroom History
August 20, 2014 10:00pm - 1:30am

Alan B.: It's the Holocaust, Charlie Brown! (10:18pm)
Alan B.: (I was busy before, sue me.) (10:18pm)
Alan B.: Diseases of Yore by MC Frontalot http://bit.ly/1uZmQJ9 (10:19pm)
Alan B.: What the fuck? http://amzn.to/1uZmYIz (10:20pm)
Alan B.: Shalom Auslander, Holocaust Tips for Kids and Smite the Heathens, Charlie Brown http://bit.ly/1uZnaYe (10:21pm)
Alan B.: A Charlie Brown Nuclear Holocaust http://bit.ly/1uZnl66 (10:21pm)
Alan B.: Isn't Pierce Brosnan 400 years old? (10:22pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZnV3J (10:24pm)
Alan B.: ^^ Synaptic Seepage is a super leet linkdump maintained by toxick, aco, chill, inky and nosmo. (10:24pm)
Alan B.: The November Man http://imdb.to/1uZo2Mu (10:25pm)
Alan B.: When I got my vasectomy, I was front and center, smelling by cauterized vas deferens. (10:25pm)
Alan B.: They strap you to the table. (10:25pm)
Alan B.: It doesn't smell pretty. (10:26pm)
Alan B.: Did you get payed by the "cavort?" (10:28pm)
Alan B.: Shat! (10:30pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZpgYm (10:30pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZpj6v (10:31pm)
Alan B.: Has Been http://bit.ly/1uZpoHl (10:31pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZpC10 (10:32pm)
Alan B.: Well, that's it. I ruined the show. (10:34pm)
Alan B.: Pete Seeger "What Did You Learn At School Today" 1964 http://bit.ly/1uZq6Eu (10:35pm)
Alan B.: Folk music theme. (10:35pm)
Alan B.: I liked that photo of KrOB in front of the Elvis "That's The Way It Is" poster, but I couldn't "like" it. (10:36pm)
Alan B.: Serendipity~ (10:36pm)
Alan B.: HOLY FUCK SUBWEENIE TIME CONTROL (10:37pm)
Alan B.: I wish I could share the Elvis love. But I don't. (10:37pm)
Alan B.: Backstage with Elvis . . . a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers . . . jam it in your fuckin' eyeballs. (10:40pm)
Alan B.: Elvis got it all. Riches, fame and died young and pretty, while the rest of us cowards trudge on to old age. (10:44pm)
Alan B.: You ever feel sorry for neckbeards http://bit.ly/1uZrJSv (10:47pm)
Alan B.: I shave that fucker ever. Single.Day. (10:47pm)
Alan B.: Nope. (10:48pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZs1bV (10:48pm)
Alan B.: .Fet Talk (10:50pm)
Alan B.: Yo soy Groot http://bit.ly/1uZspHq (10:52pm)
Alan B.: http://slate.me/1uZsz1z (10:53pm)
Alan B.: WHY DON'T YOU SHARE THE SHIT I POST!? (10:55pm)
Alan B.: http://nyti.ms/1uZsL0X FUCKING RICK TECH DOUCHEBAG DICKS (10:55pm)
Alan B.: Pee on the playa (10:55pm)
Alan B.: Before I explain just how ridiculous the spending habits of these baby billionaires have become, let%u2019s go over the rules of Burning Man: (10:57pm)
Alan B.: You bring your own place to sleep (often a tent), (10:57pm)
Alan B.: food to eat (often ramen noodles) (10:57pm)
Alan B.: nd the strangest clothing possible for the week (often not much). (10:57pm)
Alan B.: While drugs are technically illegal, they are easier to find than candy on Halloween. (10:57pm)
Alan B.: Selling things to people is also a strict no-no. (10:57pm)
Alan B.: Hitler Plans Burning Man http://bit.ly/1mv9Bws (10:58pm)
Alan B.: 24 Hours at Burning Man 2013 (11:03pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/1uZu67M (11:04pm)
Alan B.: So, the obvious next step is the wealthy tech fucks actually shooting attendees. (11:04pm)
Alan B.: What kind of lifestyle should I adopt? (11:05pm)
Alan B.: If you don't have 100 million dollars, you can't understand Burning Man. (11:06pm)
Alan B.: I-N-S-T-Ah-Graaam (11:08pm)
Alan B.: If you don't have 100 million dollars, you can't understand banjos. (11:08pm)
Alan B.: Says the comedianne who has made a forturne off of being a self-hating Jew. (11:09pm)
Alan B.: This version of "Hey Jude" makes it actually suck less. (11:16pm)
Alan B.: This version of "Yesterday" makes it actually suck less. (11:17pm)
Alan B.: This version of "Yesterday" makes NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND actually suck less. (11:19pm)
Alan B.: Anal sex song teim. (11:20pm)
Alan B.: Carnal Knowlege? http://bit.ly/1uZygg1 (11:21pm)
Alan B.: Paul Simon is a battered senior citizen http://bit.ly/1uZyqUu (11:22pm)
Alan B.: Wasn't Paul Simon's album called "Plantation?" (11:23pm)
Alan B.: Paul Simon's crime against whitey http://bit.ly/1uZyZO9 (11:24pm)
Alan B.: Slavery Lasted Until Pearl Harbor http://bit.ly/1uZzvMe (11:26pm)
Alan B.: Dylan is not interesting. (11:29pm)
Alan B.: Patti Smith beats Dylan all hollow. (11:31pm)
Alan B.: http://bit.ly/WW7j6N//lounge.obvious mag.org/incoerencia_objetiva/936full -patti-smith.jpg&imgrefurl=http://bi t.ly/1uZAqMx&zoom=1&tbnh=186&tbnw=19 1&usg=__6VU7iOIUdFlAeSicAnxPzBHGKDI= &docid=axg_n5UanSJdvM&itg=1&client=f irefox-a&sa=X&ei=Q5L1U4TkNpakyASDyYC gDw&ved=0CIwBEPwdMAw (11:32pm)
Alan B.: Oooo, that's ugly. (11:32pm)
Alan B.: Ima Firen Mah Lazor! http://bit.ly/1uZBboT (11:36pm)
Alan B.: Oh, Karen, you crazzee. (11:39pm)
Alan B.: Fuck yeah, he was a Stalinist and completely unapologetic. (11:40pm)
Alan B.: It took him until about 2011 to admit that Stalin might have made some missteps. (11:41pm)
Alan B.: But Pete's still my cuddly commie daddy. (11:41pm)
Alan B.: The Death of 'Stalin's Songbird' http://thebea.st/1uZCowq (11:42pm)
Alan B.: And now it's time for the looooooooong sign off. (11:43pm)
Alan B.: I let lots of things go by, particularly Sherilyn's things because I don't want her to hate me like she hates Karen. (11:46pm)
Alan B.: But I keep fucking with KrOB's posts because FTW. (11:47pm)
Alan B.: Okay, so you guys hate me. (11:49pm)
Alan B.: Cool story, bro. (11:53pm)
Alan B.: I seldom fuck with Puzzling Evidence's posts, but I DO randomly tag him FTW. (11:53pm)
Alan B.: What if I just thew latex paint on gravel? (11:55pm)
Alan B.: He said knob. (11:56pm)
Alan B.: Bon soir, nice people. (11:58pm)
Alan B.: And I'm very happy Puzzling Evidence closed the deal and groveled before the Programming Committee. (11:59pm)
Alan B.: It's all worth it in the long run. (11:59pm)
Alan B.: SHUT THE FUCK UP. (12:00am)
Alan B.: HIS SHOW STARTS NOW. (12:00am)
Alan B.: (I love this song.) (12:00am)
vj pussycat: me too (12:02am)
vj pussycat: your show starts now (12:02am)
vj pussycat: yes, welcome officially to reloadia, puzz (12:02am)
Alan B.: g'nite, VJ. (12:03am)
vj pussycat: aw gee alan b, you can't go to bed now (12:03am)
vj pussycat: i thought the show started now - oh it's back on i hear (12:05am)
KrOB?: KrOB shall return... WITH NOISES (12:23am)
Kroot: make me happy (12:56am)
Kroot: I am krrooooot (12:59am)

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