THE FINAL BROADCAST
NHLG FIRES PROGRAM DIRECTOR
May 9, 2017 10:00pm
NYSE HYRE LYNT GLYND on Tuesday fired Fyre Festival organizer and Radio Valencia program director John Hell after all of NHLG's binder full of lawyers recommended his immediate removal.
"The Fyre Festival is one of our nation's most cherished and respected institutions and today will mark a new beginning for our crown jewel of EDM events," Karen Carpenter said in a statement, adding, "... frankly we did not even know we had a program director until all this came out". NHLG press secretary Sherilyn Connelly said shortly before 3 p.m. PDT on Tuesday that Hell was "notified a short time ago," but while she declined to say how Hell was notified, it is believed that Connelly sent a tweet. Hell's dismissal took effect immediately.
Bob-Marc told reporters that after some sobbing Mr. Hell "accepted the recommendation of the entire legal team of NHLG, even the sorta honest ones," who unanimously recommended Hell's "dismissal." Bob-Marc also specified that all Grateful Dead albums not removed from the studio by 10pm this evening would be mocked and then given to Goodwill.
NHLG said it will immediately launch the search for a new program director, because apparently that is a job at Radio Valencia. It is rumored that John Hell was appointed program director by someone in 2010.
NYSE HYRE LYNT GLYND: Myke Rydyo Vylyncya Gryt Agyn.
May 9, 2017 10:00pm - 12:30am
Mrs.: hi (11:22pm)
Mrs.: the boys are not checking the chatroom (11:23pm)
Mrs.: #nostradamus (11:26pm)
Mrs.: #boysRstupid (11:40pm)
Karen Carpenter: grrrr (11:45pm)
Mrs.: #justtryingtogetyourattention (11:48pm)
Mrs.: I am taking shelter now (11:50pm)