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January 9, 2013 10:00pm
NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND all too often breaks the news when a well-recognized celebrity leaves the building. Kim Jong Il, Muammar Gaddafi, Bob Madigan ...

Sadly, however, this time it got real.

Not since the premature obit for Karen Carpenter have so many mourned the passing of a "beloved and easily excitable host", because Huell Howser, the irreplaceable booster of The Entire State of California and father of Doogie, has gone to the Eternal Pledge Break. The man who exposed the secret vegan menu at In-N-Out Burger, ate at more greasy spoons than Bukowski, accosted more innocent passersby than a strung-out hooker; the man for whom the term "roadside attraction" was indistinguishable from "Chuck Norris actually doing something awesome!", will no longer be insisting that Luis actually get a look at that. Discovering California gold will now be left to cynical hipsters. There..., now are you sorry you mocked him, Jimmy Kimmel?

So, for the FINAL BROADCAST of NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND, the mourning Karen Carpenter, depressed Bob-Marc, and suicidal Dr. Fiasco will try to forget and move on. It's what Huell would do.

NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND: that's amazing.

Chatroom History
January 9, 2013 10:00pm - 1:30am

vj pussycat: yea! that was kick ass! (10:07pm)
McSchmormac: was that tune by Huell Howser? (10:08pm)
vj pussycat: did garrison keillor die? (10:14pm)
vj pussycat: this is bullshit (10:14pm)
vj pussycat: big night karen (10:16pm)
vj pussycat: with stanley tucci (10:16pm)
McSchmormac: (10:17pm)
Lynae: huell was obsessed with burt lancaster (10:17pm)
freezerclown: OMG! Is that the grim reaper?! (10:20pm)
Dr. Penny: Who will folks remember more????? Garrison or Huell or Frankenstein Jones? (10:20pm)
McSchmormac: a Huellogy! (10:20pm)
vj pussycat: frezzerclown!!! (10:20pm)
vj pussycat: you're so creepy!! (10:21pm)
freezerclown: freezerclowns been replaced (10:21pm)
vj pussycat: oh yea i forgot (10:23pm)
vj pussycat: then who am i chatting with? (10:23pm)
vj pussycat: bookshelf clown? (10:25pm)
freezerclown: uh... slappy flowerpants (10:26pm)
vj pussycat: huell was definitely trippin (10:26pm) : (10:26pm)
vj pussycat: slappy impersonator flower clown (10:27pm)
vj pussycat: pants (10:27pm)
vj pussycat: i do (10:27pm) : burt lancaster? really? (10:30pm)
vj pussycat: munzer? munzer? you figure it out yet? (10:31pm)
McSchmormac: the avocado-eating dog changed my fookin' life (10:33pm) huell was really patient with old people (10:33pm)
munzer: well,that was easy (10:35pm)
vj pussycat: haha (10:35pm)
munzer: I do miss him, though, so i can connect with you all and create a pseudo bond (10:36pm)
munzer: I also like avocados and dogs (10:36pm)
vj pussycat: i love acocados (10:36pm) i totally want to mummify my cat when he dies (10:36pm)
vj pussycat: and dogs (10:36pm)
vj pussycat: and dogs who eat avocados (10:37pm)
munzer: aagain, more in common, Lieberman (10:37pm)
munzer: oops. rats. (10:37pm)
munzer: Damn (10:37pm) i wish huell had met the gianormous cat that ate raw whole oysters (10:37pm)
vj pussycat: freezer cloewn slappy pants i think you should get timmy stuffed (10:37pm)
vj pussycat: my dog ate a pot brownie (10:37pm)
munzer: I must have missed that cat oyster show. (10:38pm)
vj pussycat: haha munzer (10:38pm) remember when buddy ate thise cheese crackers and refused to move (10:38pm)
vj pussycat: yea but that was stuoid (10:39pm)
vj pussycat: new word: stuoid (10:39pm)
vj pussycat: hey is huell reporting from the afterlife? (10:39pm)
McSchmormac: this is great, I'm looking forward to Paula Deane dying already, so I can hear Dr. Fiasco's impsonation of her (10:40pm)
vj pussycat: YESS!!!!!! (10:40pm)
vj pussycat: paula and huell may have been the same person (10:40pm) ha ha. wringing every little bit of omg (10:41pm) exactly dr fiasco. (10:41pm)
McSchmormac: it's anti-ADHD TV (10:42pm)
vj pussycat: pat say crack (10:44pm)
Dr. Penny: They're pushing up daisies, together. (10:46pm)
vj pussycat: what did you call it fiasco? (10:49pm)
McSchmormac: The Fall? (10:49pm)
vj pussycat: what are natural causes? (10:49pm)
McSchmormac: he choked on an avocado-eating dog (10:52pm)
vj pussycat: awwwwww (10:54pm) osmonds. creepy (10:55pm)
vj pussycat: i was just gonna say (10:55pm)
vj pussycat: was huell at the integratron? (10:55pm)
munzer: oh, VJ!!! Yu really needed to ask that question??!! Isn't that "dangerous"?? (10:57pm)
munzer: (10:57pm)
vj pussycat: we still don't know the answer tho (11:00pm)
vj pussycat: I like the way fiasco says coachella (11:01pm) huell took the avacado eating dogs ti the integratron! (11:02pm)
Dr. Penny: lolololol, what!!!!!? But everyone loves lint! Especially the lint in the nose! (11:03pm)
Dr. Penny: the amAAAAzing nose lint. (11:03pm)
vj pussycat: this is amazing (11:03pm)
Dr. Penny: He's kicked the bucket, of water. (11:05pm)
vj pussycat: yes! huell did go to the integratron! (11:07pm) where's the foul mouthed a la florence henderson out takes (11:10pm)
vj pussycat: Florence isn't dead yet (11:11pm)
vj pussycat: paula deen (11:13pm) i bet she had a bunch of foul mouthed out tajes (11:14pm) that was the integrateon making guacamole (11:14pm)
vj pussycat: have you seen the clip of her on quaaludes on YouTube? (11:14pm) paula deen?! (11:15pm)
vj pussycat: yea. she's eating a hamburger with donuts for the bun (11:15pm) Ah hahahahahaha! im gonna look for that now (11:16pm) i use paula deen recipes a lot. (11:16pm)
vj pussycat: oh that's healthy (11:17pm) mmmmm chicken and dumplings (11:17pm)
vj pussycat: use donuts instead of dumplings (11:17pm) ha ha ha ha ha ha ... hmmmmmm (11:18pm) wwhd? (11:19pm)
vj pussycat: (11:20pm) ok. hands up who likes randy newman? (11:21pm)
vj pussycat: (11:21pm) cause i have mixed feelings (11:21pm)
vj pussycat: why freezer clown? (11:22pm) so the link folliwing paula deen us "touch my puss" (11:22pm) cause he pisses me off. (11:23pm)
vj pussycat: click it (11:23pm)
vj pussycat: cause your short? (11:23pm) hes so too clever or something (11:23pm) no not that one. its more subtle (11:24pm) theres a smurkiness to his lyrics (11:25pm) smirkiness (11:25pm) WHOO! HUELLAPALLOZA! (11:25pm)
vj pussycat: really freezer clown? (11:26pm)
vj pussycat: ya think? (11:26pm) when i was a kid thete was this "hands on science museum" (11:26pm)
vj pussycat: they killed him!! (11:26pm) my fave was going through the mouth midel and giant model intestines (11:28pm)
vj pussycat: he was a great lover? (11:29pm)
juan rapido: elseano, please do your dr. fiasco impression! (11:32pm)
juan rapido: huell howser is in hell? with karen carpenters grandparents? (11:37pm)
Dr. Penny: they probably only have misquitos on lake wobegon (11:39pm) they ate them (11:42pm)
vj pussycat: Nixon (11:42pm) the flies were a delicacy (11:43pm) the grubs (11:43pm)
McSchmormac: damn i missed Luiz Gonzaga's centenary! (11:43pm)
OrinZ: Radio Valencia has a new number, so I blathered at some random guy for a minute as Garrison Keillor. (11:46pm) can you call me and do garrison? (11:48pm)
juan rapido: i recognize that parakeet training record... (11:49pm) wonder if huell ever killed anyone? You know. In the line of duty (11:57pm) Oh yeah. Hot dog on a stick. AMAAAAZIN. (11:59pm)
storytellers: i love roadside bathrooms (12:00am)
Dr. Penny: Huell will be fuel for the Storytellers. (12:01am) I wouldnt mind returning as a dog eating avacados (12:03am)

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