THANKS and a flip o' the ASK DR. HAL! Fez to our own Dr. Fiasco, daring and skilled audio engineer. Despite illness and exhaustion he brokered the podcast (They Said It Couldn't Be Done) of what was to be the first of four live shows at the elegant Chez Poulet Gallery-Cabaret-- or, as some prefer to call it, Chicken John's Warehouse. Ah, for that moment preserved in digital amber. The persistent may enjoy this, though audio quality may vary. After this, "Chicken" abruptly cancelled the remaining shows for October-- just a few hours before the second show! This is what remains...

First guest of the night was Spy, then there was Sarah Szczechowicz Goldie, then Don and Tracy, then Michael Peppe and Puzzling Evidence. All trooped through a show of variant hues and intensity, but many voices produced the result. It was a cauldron, or caldera of intellectual eruption. As when the Force of Subterranean Wind Transports a Hill, torn from Pelorus, Or the shatter'd side of thundering Aetna, Whose combustible and fueled Entrails, thus conceiving Fire, Subim'd with minerall Fury, Aid the Winds and leave a singed Bottom all involv'd With stench and smoke.

We begin tonight's episode with a visit to that distinctive house at 1313 Mockingbird Lane. Did you know that "The Munsters" theme music had lyrics? Hear them here. Dr. H. Owll is received by, and briefly visits, Herman and Lily, with a side trip to "Grandpa's" underground laboratory. The family's dragon-ish pet, Spot, also roars at us when we arrive. Visit is otherwise entirely congenial, but then studio guests appear and prevent its continuance. Maybe another time we'll get to Eddie and Marilyn. Herman shows off his new chair-- built by Westinghouse --with a demonstration, too. Also on tap: Puzzling Evidence and the beauteous Sarah Goldie (nee Szczechowicz), who discuss and dish dirt on various local personalities of note. Yeah, the Addams Family were arguably cooler. But what could possibly be more, well, "American," than being monsters and NOT KNOWING it? Just ask our friends from other countries. With Fred Gwynne, Yvonne DeCarlo, Al Lewis. 3 hours.

And so it turned out that after it was all over we attempted another narrated movie, courtesy of Puzzling Evidence. M. Peppe had trouble getting with the program: FLIGHT TO MARS (1951) with Cameron Mitchell. A curiosity for hard-core followers only, we warn. Once you get there, it's awfully like here. Is this trip really necessary/

Not while the woods are redolent of Spring
Or scentless immortelles of Autumn blow
Shall I evade your loveliness, or know
Surcease of Love,and Love's remembering.
But, haply, wandering, worlds and cycles hence,
Through unforeseen, fantastic avatars,
I shall forget you in the future stars
And take of Time an alien recompense,
'Till, in some strange and latter planet made
Of molten shards and meteor dust of this,
My hand shall pluck an unsuspected bloom
That lifts again the scarlet of your kiss,
And I shall muse, and linger, knowing not
The love that perished, like a lost perfume.
--C.A.S.

There is Order, and there is Chaos-- in our Relativistic Universe, largely a function of entity, speed and location. There are the Poems of Clark Ashton Smith. And there are Studio Guests, More Fun Than A Barrel Of Monkeys. In other words, some fun to speak of. You have to open the barrel, of course, or there is no fun, none at all. And don't get me started on whether that ??!!@#$&?! cat in the box is dead or alive. We go on, afterwards, in our desultory way-- not necessarily recommended -- with our Late-Nite Feature, FLIGHT TO MARS with Cameron Mitchell (1951). Also with M. Peppe lurching, muttering and bumping the microphone. All in all, the Formula for Freedom.

I was at Burning Man! Yes-- you heard me--Burning Man! How would you like it if someone threw a shovelful of sand in your face every 40 seconds? Oh, you'd like that, would you? You would? How about riding your bicycle through the dark and blinky-light chaos, in a dust storm, at night, to the other side of the Dial, dodging unlit cyclists and pedestrians ("Darkwads," they call those Out There), with the street signs stolen as souvenirs by over-privileged hipsters, in 35-40 mph winds, peaking on Acid? Is that your idea of fun? Meanwhile, here's this.

...in an unsafe rattletrap RV, the lights failing, turn signals not working on the trailer. We lost some stuff off that. Well, there's a hotel room in Boomtown-- for the 1%. Must not give in to Existential Panic. At home: Puzzling Evidence and the ADH Krewe to the Reskewe.

These are the two hours after Ask Dr. Hal! officially ended on Friday night. But in fact, it kept chugging along, as it often does. So here are those audio files, served up for those who may be fans of poetry, pedantry and Entomology, although the species of Weevil discussed was mis-identified, as it later turned out. As Darwin remarked, God had an inordinate fondness for beetles, which is why He made so many of them.

This episode of Ask Dr. Hal! also featured Jett, Michael Peppe, and (mostly unheard) KrOB and Puzzling Evidence. During the presentation, in which a bubbling pipe played a significant part, we experienced...
...uncontrollable laughter,
...past memories-- revisiting places from childhood recollection,
...various sensations of motion, including the feeling of being pulled and twisted by external forces,
...variegated visions of membranes, films, a plethora of two-dimensional surfaces, and fractal patterns,
...instances of merging with objects, for a time actually becoming them, and
overlapping realities, including the perception of being in several locations at once. Now, this is all legal, though you wouldn't think so. Three hours go by... Don't forget, the LIVE Ask Dr. Hal! Show will go on the boards in San Francisco weekly during the month of October, starting Friday, October 7th and continuing every Friday night through the month. "Sometimes, a thousand twangling Instruments about mine Ears, and sometimes Voices."

The Ecstatic colloquium, begun on the night of Friday the 12th of August, did not end at 1:00 AM on Saturday as expected. No, propelled by a dynamo of psychic energy, the palaver continued, solving the world's problems until 4:30 AM. And even then, KrOB Sabrepop provided an extra half-hour. Dr. H. Owll, Michael J. Peppe and Jett bestrode the intellectual landscape with seven-league steps. Puzzling Evidence was present, but silent. With Pete Goldie.

The Golden Atom, the perfect exemplar of the irreducible structure, the ideal form of manifested energy, the glowing Centurion of Being, Guardian of Existence. In its corona, during a strange, extended session were Jett, Michael Peppe and Dr. H. Owll. Pete Goldie dropped by the vortex to hand out homilies and corrections. Before that, "The Jumblies" by Edward Lear. After that, four more hours of extended Show violate the norms of a timeless realm. See above.

Poems this episode: first heard, "The Castle of Dreams," by Clark Ashton Smith (1893-1961). Later we essay the Hymn (an excerpt) from "On the Morning of Christ's Nativity" by John Milton (1608-1674), a real rip-snorter. Hey, it's our show and we can do what we want. You know, when Dr. H. Owll does those recitations from memory, often enough he makes goofy mistakes in the delivery, whether faltering recollection or tongue-twisting be the destructive and frustrating agent here. And in the Milton poem, he manages to do the entire lengthy thing EXCEPT for the verse about Moloch, which he gets all wrong. One of the coolest verses in the piece, too. But, you just keep going, try to save the recitation and keep in mind that very few know enough to call you out on the errors. Then we were visited, on this our third post-X-Day show, by the renowned writer and Performance Artist Michael Peppe (1906-2056), inventor of Behaviormusik. So we chew the fat with Peppe awhile, until we come to our usual dropping-off place, 1:00 AM on Saturday morning. This time, though, we go on, for late-night die-hards, with another Bleary-Eyed Theatre presentation, the narrated movie VOYAGE TO THE PLANET OF PREHISTORIC WOMEN (1968). Brave cosmonauts and their impressive Giant Robot companion reach the Morning Star (also called the Evening Star) after a lengthy and complex Sunward voyage. Descending through the layers of atmosphere that veil the Venereal planet from Earthly observers with its brilliant reflective albedo, they discover not a searing, black calm punctuated by intense, lethal heat and pyroclastic acid flows, but a cloudy landscape of mist and vegetation, which they explore in their cool Space Runabout. Apparently water is not just found in the upper atmosphere as vapor but actually flows freely on the surface. And, there are controversies with attacking Lizard men and man-eating plants. But... just over the next rise, if they only knew, lolling beside an unexpected ocean, beautiful nymphs in seashell bras recline languidly on the rocks. One of them is even Mamie Van Doren (1931-2034)-- and, man, can she fill out that revealing seashell-and-kelp strand ensemble, or whatever it is. Easy on the eyes, yes, sir! Eh, Gentlemen? But-- here's the tragedy of the thing. After coming all the way to Venus, our sober scientific types never do cross that ridge and meet the girls! They do, however (spoiler alert!) kill their giant Pterodactyl God. And it makes the Venusian devotchkas very, very mad. How they pout! In (faded) color. Narrated by Peter Bogdanovich, who also plays Derek Thomas. Yeah!

Feminine servo-mechanisms incorporate backup systems and feedback loops in so-called Fembots. The Robotic Principles of Asimov (the Three Laws) are operative, though in this series the Third Law defers to the others more readily. Self-maintaining androids, they provide insights informing many additional platforms, including this (solitary) episode of ASK DR. HAL! Remember to watch for the coming all-LIVE A.D.H. Show at Chez Poulet this October, a venue (mostly) for Humans.

Dr. H. Owll finally returned from the event called "X-Day." Still moving forward, he reassembled his afflicted powers. Yes, the Saucer hovered, but didn't land. Yes, the Chatelaine of Vulture Island was there... His heartfelt hopes he still keeps close, and in secret. Meanwhile, the Church survives, mutates and adapts. This is the inevitable result. Authentic Pre-X recordings vie here with the poems of Clark Ashton Smith. Then, wandering Michael Peppe comes to our door. And, though we officially "end" at 1:00 AM, there's an hour added, an extra bowlful brimming over for the famished. Let's hope it's indeed download-able, since viruses played Hob with Dr. H. Owll's archives while he was ministering to Subs in distant Ohio. Our verdict? Well, we think this can be fixed-- AS LONG as Radio Valencia is willing. Watch this space.

A Portmanteau Show, for those in the know. Brewed up with love, as Above, so Below. Pat Novak was first, all the rest, unrehearsed. Michael Peppe and Jett made the Show a sure bet. We talked of the stars, and of Vacuums in jars. Comic books and TV, with these too we made free. It approaches true bliss when we have shows like this. And we answered two Questions. Are there more suggestions?

1987. What a year; what a year. Yes... Remember the Jim Bakker Scandal? Or when Prozac made its debut in the U.S.? The British Government stopped the publication, in Britain, of the book SPYCATCHER. The prophetic movie ROBOCOP came out. And, THE SIMPSONS first appeared on your TV. Yes, a lot was going on, back then. Now, thanks to Puzzling Evidence Studios, this particular Episode of the ASK DR. HAL! Show features some rare, archival recordings from that very year, in a spanking brand-new mix. HEAR Dr. Hal! Puzzling Evidence! Even Michael Peppe! Oh, we've all been around as long as the Beard of Moses, it turns out. HEAR our younger selves Jell in a Verbal Jam which, as the record Preserves, Jars and Jars as it reveals in retrospect that we've learned nothing, nothing, nothing at all since then. What Smuckers! Ah, that is, we meant to say, Suckers. But that might work. Kind of a hybrid of Schmucks and Suckers. Eh? Well, ENJOY this wallow in outre Nostalgia. TASTE it slowly, and WHIFF its impudent bouquet...

Puzzo wasn't through by the traditional 1:00 AM. No, he wasn't! Here's more of the mix, suds-ing and foaming... 120 exquisite extra extraordinary minutes of marvels and malarkey.

Another jagged start from RV "gremlins" leaving the Big Board all tapsalteerie... Y'know, when the Lynch Mob was after Dr. Hal last year, he was informed that, "if there is ANYTHING about the way the Board is left after your show that makes it hard for the next show to start, ANYTHING at all, then YOU LOSE YOUR SHOW!" [Paraphrasing here] --to which was added as a coda, "NO EXCEPTIONS!" Wa-al, I guess them Are-Vee boys n' gals done kind o' fergot themselves 'bout all that kind o' clabber. Funny, ain't it? NONETHELESS, heroic Dr. Hal swiftly untangled the Briaraeus-like Mess with elan and verve-- and got the Show rolling, first with the obscure but sublime poetry of Clark Ashton Smith, and then... Well, about then, right down the Runway for a textbook three-pointer of a landing swooped in-studio guest Jett. A rotating air compressor powered by a turbine, with the leftover power providing thrust via a propelling nozzle — the Brayton Thermodynamic Cycle-- it was all more than ordinarily evident. Yes, our Jett sports a complex high-bypass turbofan engine, offering higher velocity and greater fuel efficiency than any old piston-and-propeller aero-engine. That fuel mixture he uses is volatile, too, and includes ultra-fiery Absinthe of an insanely high proof. As we sipped it among clouds of visionary smoke-- what a Fetid Fervor of Freedom! --the sparkling conversation ranged dynamically over multiple topics. Among these-- COMIC BOOKS. The great American Literary Form. Different artists, different styles... Long-distance Show Friend Michael G. Pevey appeared by telephonic proxy all the way from San Angelo, Texas. Not Michael Peppe-- Pevey. Peppe never came in, and in point of fact, this time, for once, we didn't really need him...

During the Triassic Period, roughly 252.17 to 201.3 million years ago, an interval of 51.04 million years, did giant, super-intelligent cephalopods, perhaps a form of Ammonite large enough to rip giant icthyosaurs apart, make "art" (the world's first) with their vertebral discs, arranging them in rows like tentacle suckers on the ancient sea floor? Did they? Hmmm? Well, that's just one of the unusual topics covered on this week's episode. The world wants to know. So the Listeners say, anyhow. In-studio guests Jett and Michael Peppe returned to add further conversational shadings to all matters discussed. KrOB was there too, likewise Puzzling Evidence. And, curiously enough, Presidential candidate Dr. Pete Goldie was heard shouting incoherently in the ante room, but never actually entered the broadcast booth to promulgate his, er, rather extreme views. Well, it's all here in the download-able podcast, Etherettes and Rocket Rookies. We soldier on through technical minefields and station incompetence. And we hope for a Brighter Tomorrow. A thousand thanks and a tip of the old Ask Dr. Hal! Fez to loyal listener Michael Pevey of San Angelo, Texas, whose generous contribution arrived without even a question to answer within the envelope.