Tonight's NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND FINAL BROADCAST, "Music for the End of the World", was just cancelled due to the disturbing nature of the auditory imagery. We apologize for not submitting our show theme a week in advance, as now required by Radio Valencia Program Manager and Dear Leader John Hell.

The planned show has been replaced with "Happy Music Time starring the Fukushima Singing Firemen".

Karen Carpenter and Dr. Fiasco will take time from panic shopping for canned food, plastic sheeting and iodine pills to present the heartwarming musical story of a nuclear family that faces madcap difficulties during a disaster drill. ("TV Guide synopsis: When Billy-san is late from his surfing lesson, Dad flies into a rage and evacuates the rest of the family to a seaside resort. Oh, the troubles they get into!").

NOSE HAIR LINT GLAND, Radio Valencia's Unbreachable Containment Vessel.